One development I have noticed is an increase in the number of people who demonstrate entitlement. This trend is of course not limited to academia. Pundits have been pointing this out for years. I am unsure if a sense of entitlement is a result of the participation trophy philosophy of the last 15-20 years or something else. What I have noticed is an increase in students thinking they should get an A because they submitted something. Work that had not met the minimum requirements to garner a C is nonetheless being touted as A work. Excellence, it seems, is equal to participating. Some have even used the word "deserve" in connection with the grade of A.
When I was ten years old I began playing football in my school league. There were 16 teams, two divisions, and each team consisted of players from the 4th grade to the 8th grade -roughly 10 to 13, or thereabouts. I was on the Eagles.
The Eagles played for the league championship my first year on the team. I played in every game. The coach would send in the 4th graders in the final quarter. We played offense only as to ensure the other team would not score on us.
At the end of each season was the awards banquet where team and individual awards were presented. The team came in second place and so I was presented a trophy. Although I was initially excited about receiving my first trophy, the feeling of elation wore off the next day. You see, I knew I was awarded that trophy because I was a member of the team, not because I performed or participated in any way that resulted in the team winning the trophy. In other words, I did not feel that I had earned that trophy. And so I placed the trophy in my bedroom closet, where it stayed for four years.
Four years later I was in 8th grade. I started on both offense and defense and was on the All-Star team. The Eagles won the league championship that year. That time, as I was keenly aware of how I helped the team secure the trophy, I placed that trophy on the shelf above my bed because I knew that I had earned the accolades and my part in the team securing that trophy.
I was cognizant of the difference between deserving something and earning something, which is something I try to instill in my students. This is known as a soft skill, an emotional quotient and something that employers look for: potential team members with the soft skills that translate into successful members of their corporate team.
I wonder if that is one of the major differences between the feelings of earning something and a feeling of deserving something: team work. To earn something is to participate as a member of something greater than oneself while entitlement is focusing on oneself?
I played football from nine years. I was on the track team four years. I was in the Army for over seven years and was part of numerous other teams throughout my life. Although some of my colleagues here and across the country may see what they do as compartmentalized, I see what I do as a member of a team: the History Department team, the Liberal Arts Division team and the College team. Students are indeed members of a team. My classroom is a team and I happen to be the Project Manager. Feelings of entitlement have no place in my classroom nor in the corporate world.
I wonder if that is one of the major differences between the feelings of earning something and a feeling of deserving something: team work. To earn something is to participate as a member of something greater than oneself while entitlement is focusing on oneself?
I played football from nine years. I was on the track team four years. I was in the Army for over seven years and was part of numerous other teams throughout my life. Although some of my colleagues here and across the country may see what they do as compartmentalized, I see what I do as a member of a team: the History Department team, the Liberal Arts Division team and the College team. Students are indeed members of a team. My classroom is a team and I happen to be the Project Manager. Feelings of entitlement have no place in my classroom nor in the corporate world.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
From my experience, as an emotional being, I found out that we are not entitled to love. Being entitled is the right to deserve something. I made the ascertainment that people view love as their entitlement. When they think they got it all when it comes to financial stability and moral qualities, they think they deserve the right person by their side so they can believe that they filled that missing part of the picture.
ReplyDeleteSelf entitled people often view other people as they servant for their wants and needs without realizing that they are all the same. Self-entitled people think that they are special and believe that have to receive a special treatment all the time. If they do not get what they want, they become less patient, less considerate with others. I say talk about entitlement to love because it is what I experienced and observed but it is ultimately it is the least expected thing to be entitled for as true love is unconditional love and being entitled, you imposed conditions to the other person in how to love you. Those thoughts just came to me because I was always giving my all to the person I thought was fit for me, and the energy was not returned. I felt entitled to that person’s love. Honestly, I lied to myself several times by thinking that I was giving a selfless love , which is loving without any conditions, but it was really just a selfish love. What could I get from that relationship? I could get love. In the name of love, self entitled people become selfish who gives love to get love. It was an ugly truth that made me realize that it was never about the other person, but it was all about me. My self-entitlement made me believe that by giving love, I was entitled to receive it. I learned the hard way that, nobody is entitled to love. What used tp be my expectations, does not exist anymore.